When you take time to nurture yourself you have more energy to give to others.
Words of encouragement, a loving touch, laughter and play, creative pursuits, fun and games, these are all things we hunger for and need to give to ourselves in order to feel nurtured. Unfortunately, our society is so task driven that we often don’t take time for these self-nurturing activities. We may be willing to nurture our children, our pets and our loved ones with time and attention, but how much do we offer ourselves?
It’s almost as though the minute we stop our stream of activity and to-dos in order to relax, play or rejuvenate, an alarm bell goes off with a silent warning: “The prisoner is about to escape.” Suddenly, a list of shoulds comes streaming into our mind releasing a fountain of guilt for daring to take time for ourselves.
Yet, when we can get past our internal taskmaster and take the time for self-nurturing activities, our mind and body finally relaxes. We find our center, our mind clears, our emotions calm, and our soul expands. Giving to ourselves is similar to being nurtured as a child; we feel safe, loving and joyful. We then have so much more to give back to others.
How to Take Time to Nurture Yourself
Self-nurturing can become a new habit with a little awareness and some new actions. Explore the following suggestions as a way to nurture yourself more often.
What feels nurturing? What does your mind, body, heart and soul need in order to feel nurtured? Right now, notice the state of your mind – what would support your mind to be balanced? Check in with your body – what does it need in terms of rest, exercise, nutrition, fun, and pleasure? Listen to your heart – what would soothe and soften your heart? Center within your spiritual self and connect with your soul – what would uplift, inspire and free your soul?
How often do you nurture yourself? Do you give to yourself daily, weekly, monthly? What gets in the way of doing this more often? What would you have to say “No” to in order to nurture yourself more? What would you have to say “Yes” to? Find ways to let go of guilt, stop over caretaking, and instead honor your needs.
What happens when you do and don’t self-nurture? If you go without taking care of your mental, physical, emotional, spiritual and social needs for a long period of time, how does this affect you? How does it affect those around you? What about when you do take time to nurture all aspects of yourself – how does this affect you and those around you? Which is the healthier way to live?
Make a list of nurturing activities. Brainstorm a list of self-nurturing activities you would enjoy. Some of these activities may involve other people, some may be on your own. Each day, look at the list and choose one or more to take part in. If your inner ‘taskmaster’ tries to control you with shoulds, to-dos or guilt, stop for a moment, take a deep breath and tell your taskmaster to take a vacation. Then ask your true self what it is you really want to do, and honour that.
As you take time to nurture yourself you’ll have more energy to give to others. It’s a win-win situation for creating balance in life.
What are your favorite ways to nurture yourself and what supports you to do this? Please share below.
Another means to relaxation is acceptance. I find that implementing acceptance indeed relieves stress however I feel private and cut off from the real world… I believe its called aloofness. I am not sure. I want to seek other means to relaxation. Its a relief (pun intended) that I’ve found several articles including your/this article in the web about self-nurture and interpersonal nurture. Thanks for sharing!!!
Hello Mayama,
Yes, acceptance is a wonderful way to feel relief and relaxation. Instead of going against what is, denying reality or judging ourselves, another or a situation, we simply accept it as it is in the moment. That feeling of aloofness may be a state of neutrality – not getting caught in the drama or judgment. To me it is a healthy form of non-attachment. From this place we can move more deeply into our true spiritual nature of love and compassion.
Thanks for you comments,
Gini